Wednesday, December 7, 2016

Fruit and Cheese Day!

Happy Pearl Harbor Day!  75 years ago, the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor, thus ensuring the United States of America entered World War 2.

Also, it was Fruit and Cheese Day!  This is a day when Shortcake and Santa and people bring in fruit and cheese.  It's an attempt to have one day where the focus is on  - well, not healthy items, but healthier items than cookies and candy.  And it is a wonderful tradition.  It really is one of Shortcake's better ideas.  Because cheese is delicious.  Also fruit.  Mostly cheese.

This was the spread.

Hmmmmm.  Other stuff that happened today.  Oh!  Santa went to JFK for an event with Mrs. Claus and Spritz and Sprinkles and Cider.  There was a discussion if Santa should wear his harness.  He likes to lean out of the plane and wave with both hands, while Cider holds him into the plane by his harness.  And Santa got bruises last year from the harness, so he thought about not wearing it, but then Cider pointed out, if he didn't have a harness, there would be no way for Cider to hold on to him, and then Santa could fall out of the plane.  Santa wore his harness.

Shortcake spent a lot of the day dealing with schedules and logistics.  It's the kind of stuff Shortcake loves doing, but it takes a lot of mental energy, especially if she's also doing her normal tasks in the Land.

Poor Shortcake was late to work today.  She left her house 1 minute later than usual, so she missed her train (look, not everyone gets to commute via sleigh) (the train was closing its doors as she walked into the station), and then the next train was slow and paused for train traffic (seriously - it's rush hour - can't you plan for train traffic by this point?  Hasn't the MTA been doing this for over 100 years?) and then Shortcake set off the emergency alarm as she tried to take the back stairs to the 8th floor, so she had to take the long way through the store and down an escalator, and so she was 8 minutes late which drives her nuts.  And to add insult to injury Cider was there before her when he wasn't supposed to get there before 9:15....  AUGH.  Shortcake was filled with rage.  She was made at the trains, at the MTA, at real estate housing policy, at physics.  Mostly at herself.  If she had just left earlier.

Both Cider and Blissful are under the weather this week.  Cider feels like he has ball bearings in his throat, and Blissful can't keep down solid food.  She's surviving on smoothies.  Poor thing.

There was a proposal in the Village.  She said yes.  Really, it's hard to get excited about these now.  Shortcake's seen or heard about so many over the years.  Of course people are going to propose in front of Santa.

There was a mean, mean woman today.  She refused to go into the house Butterscotch led her to.  So she stood in the middle of the Village and picked a fight.  Dumpling got Shortcake.  The woman said she wanted to see the elves, and then see Santa.  Shortcake confirmed she had, in fact, been through the Maze, and then pointed out that the next step was seeing Santa.  The woman said - wait, we'll do it like a script.

MEAN, MEAN WOMAN: The people in front of me in line went that way.
SHORTCAKE: Santa has one house, but many doors.  (Shortcake looks significantly at the woman.)
MMW: I want to see the elves and then Santa.
S: The elves take you to see Santa.
MMW: But those people went that way.
S: You can go with Butterscotch and go this way to see Santa or you can go with Chuckles and go that way to see Santa.  But you can only go with one elf.
MMW: I will go this way and then I will go that way.
S: No.  You can go left or right.  Both ways will take you to Santa, but you must pick one.  Left.  Or right.
MMW: I will go here and then I will go there.
S: No.  You have to pick one.
MMW: She (meaning Butterscotch) was disrespectful.  I don't like her attitude.  She touched me too much.
S: (frantically trying to figure out a diplomatic way out of this without throwing Butterscotch under the bus and failing) I will talk to her about her behavior.  But you need to pick a way to go.
MMW: I'll go this way.
S: Thank you.
(MMW walks away and Shortcake immediately turns to Butterscotch, who is crying, and apologizes and gives her a HUGE hug and then Treetop hugs them both.)


Stephanie Shapiro said...

Awesomely written!!!

Stardust said...

Santa wore his harness. Hahaha I can actually hear this conversation happening.